in a way podcast episode 1

doing this mainly because a friend was lamenting the apparent lack of creativity in christian radio. good music for you.

who's fault?

i don't say this facetiously or sarcastically. i realize most of us don't really have as much of a choice as we would like to regarding the people we feel obliged to communicate with. but honestly, where do some of us get the idea that we have to pursue an active relationship with those who live completely foolish lives if we don't have any kind of positive impact on them. one might say. "well you never know! maybe they will change!". first, hypothesis is not a good grounds for remaining miserable or stressed out. we are not responsible for curtailing the natural consequences that befall people who do whatever they want to do. secondly, we have to examine our own hearts in situations like this. are we really doing what we do for their benefit, or are we doing it to make ourselves feel like the good guy? problem is, if we set ourselves up for some kind of fallout because of what we saw was coming, it totally removes our "goodness" when we bitch and moan about how so and so is screwing up my life, and they don't appreciate anything i do, and they owe me respect or whatever. if you are someone who thinks that way, yer living on the wrong planet. humans suck, regardless of your idealism and optimism. you are only in charge of you. even if you are raising children, you don't have as much effect on their future as you would like to think you do. third, and most important, God's word talks about "fools" or people who are "evil" countless times. what, you think you aren't related to any, or hang around them (hopefully you don't)? Jesus said that if we follow Him, we have to make hard choices about the people we associate with.
Matt. 36 - 39 “Do not think that I have come to bring peace to the earth. I have not come to bring peace, but a sword. For I have come to set a man against his father, and a daughter against her mother, and a daughter-in-law against her mother-in-law. "And a person’s enemies will be those of his own household. Whoever loves father or mother more than me is not worthy of me, and whoever loves son or daughter more than me is not worthy of me. And whoever does not take his cross and follow me is not worthy of me. Whoever finds his life will lose it, and whoever loses his life for my sake will find it.".
anything or anyone that does not bring you closer to God is an enemy. it doesn't mean we should hate anyone or treat someone badly, and regardless of how screwed up someone's choices are, we should still assist them if they have no food or shelter. but there is a very clear line, and if we don't stay on God's side of that line, we will suffer for no good reason. summing up, i leave you with this awesome verse from proverbs 1.
Blessed is the man
who walks not in the counsel of the wicked,
nor stands in the way of sinners,
nor sits in the seat of scoffers;
but his delight is in the law of the LORD,
and on his law he meditates day and night.

true to thyself

for a very long time, i have wondered to myself, "why am i not pursuing music by the same methods that all these other musicians are?". i can only answer that now. i have to be in full control of my music. my songs are like my children. i don't want ANYONE else raising them the way THEY think is right. it's really only been within the last few years that a musician can record, mix and master at a professional level themselves at a relatively inexpensive cost. it has also not been possible to distribute, market and promote music effectively without outside help until the advent of internet music sites like noisetrade, and self distribution sites like cd baby. i literally am in control of every aspect of all my music through my own actual record label, leik nel. i receive all royalties, and control price and availability. my music will not go "out of print" because a label isn't making enough profit to justify the proliferation of my albums. i don't get input from anyone. i make music that i like, and if i sell albums in that process, i am thrilled. but most importantly, i make music because i love making music, and i write lyrics that point to Jesus as the source of all that is good. i have no pressure from anyone to change one iota musically or lyrically. this would not have been possible on the scale that i am now working even 2 years ago. every dog has his day. God is good.

mourir seul - you're little (original demo)

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=XhBayfHcehA

new song

this is a demo of a song i just wrote. got some work to do on it, but i like it a lot. yes i know it has a bowie vibe in the vocals. 
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=XhBayfHcehA

drivel

i wrote this as a response to a thread on a "christian" music page a long time ago. i was new to the internet so i didn't know not to use all caps. now i try to make up for it by using caps only in reference to God. :)



"HI,
  THIS IS THE FIRST TIME I HAVE BEEN INVOLVED IN ANY KIND OF ONLINE
DISCUSSION, BUT I FELT COMPELLED TO RESPOND BECAUSE OF THE SUBJECT
MATTER. I AM A 32 YEAR OLD MALE CHRISTIAN WHO ALSO HAPPENS TO WRITE
AND PRODUCE MY OWN MUSIC. I HAVE'NT BEEN A CHRISTIAN ALL MY LIFE, OR
EVEN A MAJORITY, BUT WHEN I WAS BORN AGAIN, IT WAS A TREMENDOUS
CHANGE IN EVERY AREA OF MY LIFE. GOD HAS TURNED ON MY INTELLECT AND
CREATIVITY IN A WAY THAT I NEVER WOULD HAVE IMAGINED POSSIBLE.
  FROM A MUSICIAN'S PERSPECTIVE, I BELIEVE CREATING ANY KIND OF ART IS
AN EXPRESSION OF SPIRITUAL AND EMOTIONAL RELEASE. MANY MUSICIANS
CRAFT MUSIC THAT WILL APPEAL TO THE MASSES, AND CAUSE THE GENERAL
PUBLIC TO SING ALONG WITH THEIR CATCHY TUNES. BUT I BELIEVE TRUE
ARTISTS EXPRESS WHO THEY ARE AND WHAT THEY BELEIVE IN THROUGH THEIR
MUSIC. I DON'T WANT TO BELITTLE ANYONE BECAUSE EVERYONE HAS THEIR
PLACE AND PURPOSE, BUT MANY PEOPLE IN BANDS OR MAKING MUSIC ARE NOT
SINCERELY COMMITTING TO REALISM OR HONESTY IN WHAT THEY ARE DOING.
IT'S POSSIBLE THAT I COULD BE MISINTERPETING SHALLOWNESS OF CHARACTER
OR LACK OF GENUINESS FOR BLATANT COMMERCIALISM, SO I CAN'T BE SURE OF
ANYONE'S MOTIVES. BUT I CAN TELL YOU THAT FROM A BIBLICAL
PERSPECTIVE, I BELIEVE THAT GOD WOULD PREFER AN ATHEIST BEING HONEST
AND INTROSPECTIVE OVER ANYONE(SAVED OR NOT) JUST SAYING A BUNCH OF
WORDS THAT BEAR NO RESEMBLANCE TO THE AUTHORS HEART, OR EVEN WORSE,
ARE DECEITFUL IN THEIR PRESENTATION OF THE SINGER OR BAND. IF SOMEONE
IS SINGING SONGS FOR ANY OTHER REASON THAN EXPRESSION, HOW CAN YOU
CALL THIS CREATIVITY? ANYONE WITH SOME MINIMAL TALENT IN THE RIGHT
PLACE AT THE RIGHT TIME CAN MAKE SOME CASH SELLING RECORDS, BUT MOST
PEOPLE CAN'T EVEN BE HONEST ABOUT WHAT REALLY MATTERS, WITH THEIR
FRIENDS OR EVEN GOD, MUCH LESS THE RECORD BUYING PUBLIC. JESUS SAID
IN REVELATION 3:15-16, "I KNOW ALL THE THINGS YOU DO, THAT YOU ARE
NEITHER HOT NOR COLD. I WISH YOU WERE ONE OR THE OTHER! BUT SINCE YOU
ARE LIKE LUKEWARM WATER, I WILL SPIT YOU OUT OF MY MOUTH."
  GOD KNOWS OUR HEARTS, AND I TRULY THINK SINCERITY IS A FIRST
REQUIREMENT TO COME TO GOD. MANY WITHIN THE CHURCH STRUCTURE ARE NOT
TRUE BELIEVERS IN THE PIVOTAL SENSE OF THE WORD, AND THIS SEEMS VERY
PREVALENT AMONG CHRISTIAN MUSIC FANS. THIS IS A GENERALIZATION, AND
DOES NOT APPLY UNIVERSALLY, BUT I HAVE SEEN A TRUE LACK OF REALNEES
IN THE CHRISTIAN MUSIC SCENE THAT RIVALS NON-BELIEVERS. OFCOURSE THE
PROBLEM LIES WITHIN THE LACK OF VISION TO EVEN RECOGNIZE THE ABSENCE
OF THE HOLY SPIRIT FOR THOSE WHO HAVE IT IN THE HEAD BUT NOT THE
HEART. OUR HEARTS ARE DECEITFULLY WICKED, SO WE
DON'T EVEN KNOW WHEN WE ARE LYING TO OURSELVES ABOUT MONUMENTAL
SUBJECT MATTER, SUCH AS OUR OWN SALVATION!
  MY POINT IS, THE REASON ALOT OF CHRISTIAN MUSIC FAILS TO ILICIT A
RESPONSE FROM MOST PEOPLE THE WAY SECULAR MUSIC DOES, IS BECAUSE MOST
PEOPLE LIKE TO LISTEN TO LYRICS AND MUSIC THAT SPEAK TO THEM ON A
PERSONAL LEVEL. I PERSONALLY DON'T GET THAT OUT OF ANY BAND THAT
SPOUTS CARDBOARD, EMPTY WORDS THAT ANYONE COULD WRITE DOWN WITHOUT
ANY REAL DEPTH. JOY AND PAIN STEM FROM VERY DEEP WITHIN US, AND TO BE
IN TOUCH WITH OUR TRUE SELVES IS GOD'S INTENTION. FOR AN ARTIST, WHY
WASTE SUCH AN OPPORTUNITY ON MINDLESS DRIVEL? JESUS DIDN'T.
                 




                      GOD IS LOVE"

Yeah right! pt.3

He is a rock. What he does is perfect. All his ways are fair. He is a faithful God, who does no wrong. He is honorable and reliable. 

Deut 32:4 (GW)

God's way is perfect! 

Psalms 18:30 (GW)

The teachings of the Lord are perfect. They renew the soul. The testimony of the Lord is dependable. It makes gullible people wise. 

Psalms 19:7 (GW)

God shines from Zion, the perfection of beauty. 

Psalms 50:2 (GW)

If you love those who love you, do you deserve a reward? Even the tax collectors do that! Are you doing anything remarkable if you welcome only your friends? Everyone does that! That is why you must be perfect as your Father in heaven is perfect. 

Matt 5:46-48 (GW)

How can we possibly be perfect? We can’t. Then why did Jesus say this? To point out that we can’t! And this, once again, is what separates us from God. But because God loves us so much, He has actually taken care of that problem Himself. 

Then Peter, because he was filled with the Holy Spirit, said to them, “Rulers and leaders of the people, today you are cross-examining us about the good we did for a crippled man. You want to know how he was made well. You and all the people of Israel must understand that this man stands in your presence with a healthy body because of the power of Jesus Christ from Nazareth. You crucified Jesus Christ, but God has brought him back to life. He is the stone that the builders rejected, the stone that has become the cornerstone. No one else can save us. Indeed, we can be saved only by the power of the one named Jesus and not by any other person.” 

Acts 4:8-12 (GW)

Salvation – the deliverance of man or his soul from the power or penalty of sin; redemption

If you need a more thorough examination of the means of being saved by God from the penalties for what you have done wrong, I highly suggest you read my other blog “The Simple Truth”.

The bible speaks of man’s natural state of imperfection which is in need of saving several times.

The human mind is the most deceitful of all things. It is incurable. No one can understand how deceitful it is. 

Jer 17:9 (GW)

Jesus said, “Don't you understand yet? Don't you know that whatever goes into the mouth goes into the stomach and then into a toilet? But whatever goes out of the mouth comes from within, and that's what makes a person unclean. Evil thoughts, murder, adultery, {other} sexual sins, stealing, lying, and cursing come from within. These are the things that make a person unclean. 

Matt 15:16-20 (GW)

We have all strayed like sheep. Each one of us has turned to go his own way, and the Lord has laid all our sins on him. 

Isaiah 53:6 (GW)

The corrupt nature's attitude leads to death. But the spiritual nature's attitude leads to life and peace. This is so because the corrupt nature has a hostile attitude toward God. It refuses to place itself under the authority of God's standards because it can't. Those who are under the control of the corrupt nature can't please God. 

Romans 8:5-9 (GW)

God was pleased to have all of himself live in Christ. God was also pleased to bring everything on earth and in heaven back to himself through Christ. He did this by making peace through Christ's blood sacrificed on the cross. Once you were separated from God. The evil things you did showed your hostile attitude. But now Christ has brought you back to God by dying in his physical body. He did this so that you could come into God's presence without sin, fault, or blame. 

Col 1:19-22 (GW)

Sin came into the world through one person, and death came through sin. So death spread to everyone, because everyone sinned. Sin was in the world before there were any laws. But no record of sin can be kept when there are no laws. Yet, death ruled from the time of Adam to the time of Moses, even over those who did not sin in the same way Adam did when he disobeyed. 

Romans 5:12-14 (GW)

Since you are stubborn and don't want to change the way you think and act, you are adding to the anger that God will have against you on that day when God vents his anger. At that time God will reveal that his decisions are fair. He will pay all people back for what they have done. He will give everlasting life to those who search for glory, honor, and immortality by persisting in doing what is good. But he will bring anger and fury on those who, in selfish pride, refuse to believe the truth and who follow what is wrong. There will be suffering and distress for every person who does evil, for Jews first and non-Jews as well. But there will be glory, honor, and peace for every person who does what is good, for Jews first and non-Jews as well. God does not play favorites. 

Romans 2:5-11 (GW)

These passages clearly divide humanity into two categories. Those who live by their own rules, and those who try to live the way God wants us to. Those who make it up as they go are driven by their own passions and desires. Selfishness is their natural inclination. And although they cannot be aware of it, they are not good. Those who are born again and live to serve God have the advantage of God’s Spirit within them guiding them and letting them see how things really are, including their own selfishness. And because they also inherit God’s righteousness when they enter a relationship with Jesus, they now have the choice to do what is right, as opposed to being naturally inclined toward that which is wrong. Of course, those who follow Jesus are still not “good”, as evidenced by their own thoughts and actions even after being redeemed by Jesus’ death and resurrection. But because they have accepted the fact that they are not good, and now rely on God’s goodness, they are now seen as being good through the shed blood of Christ. C.S. Lewis said in the amazing primer of faith “Mere Christianity” that the reason many reject following Jesus is because the ideas behind who He is and what He really did are not simple enough for our minds to fully process. He said that this alone makes it obvious that the bible is truly the word of God, and not man. If Christianity were an invention of the human mind, it would be simple and easy to digest. It would also be appealing to what we want to hear about ourselves. It definitely isn’t a happy happy joy joy concept that all of us are self centered, deceitful and just plain bad in our natural state. And then that the only way to rectify the problem of our separation from God is through God Himself coming here and enduring horrible, undeserved pain and suffering which led to His eventual death and short term residence in hell. Paul, who wrote most of the letters in the New Testament, and is considered to be an outstanding vessel of God, bringing millions of people to the knowledge of salvation through Christ wrote:

I know that nothing good lives in me; that is, nothing good lives in my corrupt nature. Although I have the desire to do what is right, I don't do it. 

Romans 7:18 (GW)

Many people claim that they are good, or righteous. Yet this man, whom God used extensively within His own communication to us, states clearly that he himself is not good! How arrogant for any of us to believe that we are good.

When you are driving and someone cuts you off, what is your initial instinct? And if someone at work cusses you out, how would you react if you did not utilize self-control? Most would admit that our reaction in these scenarios would not lean toward the kindly. How could a naturally good creature summon these initial reactions? Not possible. The whole idea of there being One who is actually good is the crux of our distorted perception. We deal with so much ego, that without a full understanding of God, we tend to feel worthless and hopeless if we truly ponder our own bad behavior and thoughts. But when we are able to accept that Jesus sees every one of us as equally worthy to die for, we are able to alleviate some of that potential self loathing. You need to understand that if you were the only human ever born, and you were imperfect, He still would have died so that you could be redeemed through His sacrifice. Good for bad.

Then, brothers and sisters, firmly hold on to the traditions we taught you either when we spoke to you or in our letter. God our Father loved us and by his kindness gave us everlasting encouragement and good hope. Together with our Lord Jesus Christ, may he encourage and strengthen you to do and say everything that is good. 

2 Thess 2:15-17 (GW)

Certainly, there is no one so righteous on earth that he always does what is good and never sins. 

Eccl 7:20 (GW)